Imagination rules the world

I have done a lot of stupid things in my life - things that I should be embarrassed of and definitely not admitting in this blog. But I am not embarrassed to say I’ve learned these lessons the hard way because, let’s be honest, it’s pretty funny. My lack of common sense in some situations is mind blowing at times. I’ve decided to compile a short list of “life lessons I learned the hard way” because it strays away from the serious topics I usually talk about and is a fun blog entry for once!

(1) Peaches Hurt.
Everybody knows that peaches have fuzz on them. But, what I bet you weren’t aware of is that once the peach is rubbed on your face, those seemingly harmless little fuzzies become painful shards stuck in your pores. Seriously. For some reason one day I decided to feel what the peach fuzz would feel like when I rubbed it on my face. It was harmless enough. But, after rolling it around on my face a few times, I put the peach away and then rubbed my face. Sure enough, those “fuzzies” imbedded themselves into every pore and my face became a bed of sharp prickles. It was incredibly awkward and painful for a few days whenever I rubbed my face.

(2) Curling Irons Also Hurt.
Another smart move in my life occurred one day when I was curling my hair. Everyone knows that curling irons are hot. It’s a pretty obvious fact. But, what’s NOT hot on the curling iron that my Mom had was the little white tip at the end of the iron that you can hold onto while you’re curling your hair. I’ve touched it a thousand times with my hands and had never burned me. So, one day while curling my hair, I decided to be a dork and touch the tip of the curling iron (the part covered in plastic) onto my tongue to “see what would happen.” Sure enough, the white tip somehow became as hot as the iron itself and I burned my tongue. I felt special when someone asked me what I did to burn my tongue and I told them I licked a curling iron.

(3) Playground Equipment Hurts Adults



These seem harmless, right?


WRONG!

I can’t even count how many times, as a child, I did something dangerous at a playground. They’re pretty much a breeding ground for injuries, are they not? Here’s the kicker though – it seems like the kids are never the ones getting injured! I have been injured TWICE at the playground this summer and this is when I am taking Melina to play! I have learned that maybe adults just shouldn’t try to relive their youth through playground equipment but I’m sure I’ll continue doing so as she gets older.
Earlier this summer, I took Melina to one of the playgrounds in town and decided to try hang from the monkey bars. It’s been a very long time since I’ve been on playground equipment to play but I decided to try one of the tricks I used to do as a kid. The ‘trick’ was to hang from the monkey bars with your hands and then swing your legs through the opening between your arms, kind of doing a suspended sommersault. Well, Melina, having more foresight than me, predicted mom was going to hurt herself and told me to get off the equipment but I didn’t listen and started to do my trick. Halfway through my sommersalt, my shoulder twisted at a funny angle and, well, needless to say, we were done our jaunt at the park after that! My shoulders never twisted uncomfortably doing that as a kid.
Just the other day, TJ & I took Melina to the playground by our house. She’s still too short to get onto a lot of the ‘big kid’ equipment so I decided I’d show her how to walk up a slide to get to the top of the landing! I thought I was so cool, climbing up a slide just like I did so many times as a kid. I didn’t take into account how many feet I’ve grown since graduating from kiddie slides. As I was going up the slide at top speed, my face met abruptly with a horizontal steel pole at the top of the slides’ landing. My head snapped back and TJ told me he heard the crack of my nose hitting the pole from across the park. He looked at me like I was a complete dumbass for not realizing there was a pole on the landing but as I walked towards him with tears in my eyes, he realized I was actually hurt! I kind of chuckled at the stupidity of the whole situation while asking him if my nose is broken. It wasn’t - just bruised, red and tender for the next few days. I’ve learned that I probably shouldn’t try to pretend I’m a kid anymore and accept the fact that I’m an *gulp* adult now! Yikes. I’ll still try to teach her to do things at the playground but I’m going to keep my face forward from now on so I can face oncoming poles with style and grace!

Life is not merely being alive, but being well.

I am not one of those people with a ridiculously strong belief system. I chalk this up to my not knowing 110% who I am at this point in my life. Unlike a lot of people my age, I don’t prescribe to a particular political party or religion. I am kind of ‘wishy washy’ in that way, I suppose.

There is, however, one thing that I feel very strongly about and it wasn’t until I had a daughter that this particular belief took hold. What is this belief, you ask? Simply put, it’s instilling confidence and self-esteem in your children, especially young girls. I am disgusted when I see how many elementary school girls are obsessed with their weight.

I heard about a new book called “Maggie Goes on a Diet” which is set to be published in October (actually, on my daughter’s birthday). This book is aimed at children ages 6+ and is about the main character Maggie, going on a diet and losing weight.

Hearing about this book frustrated me beyond belief. Six-year-olds shouldn’t even know the word ‘diet,’ in my opinion. Upon reading the summary of the book, I learned that it’s about Maggie who uses diet and exercise to lose excess weight. Maybe this book would be accepted more openly if it had been marketed a different way. I won’t argue that it’s important for children to learn about healthy eating and physical activity but I don’t think it should be shoved down their throats with an illustrated book aimed at Grade 1 girls! Just take a look at the cover of the book:



Does this image remind anyone of eating disorder images that pop up all over the internet:



*shudders* I would never in a million years purchase a book like this for my daughter. She is going to learn about healthy eating through my cooking and will be physically active because I will be physically active with her and will encourage her to be physically active.

Another thing that frustrates me about the state of the younger generation’s self-esteem issue is that their negative self-image can be prevented through proper parenting techniques by simply paying attention to the things you do/say around your children. Going on a fad diet (i.e., cabbage soup diet) isn’t setting a good example for your children. You might think they’re too young to notice your eating habits but they aren’t. If you aren’t following a healthy lifestyle (that is, eating healthy foods and getting proper exercise), you aren’t setting the right example for your kids. How can you expect your children not to have self-esteem issues when you’re constantly trying different diets and bad-talking yourself and your weight?

Since my daughter has started talking, I’ve tried to eliminate a lot of the self-hate talk that I do oh-so-often! She might only be three but you can bet she understands what I’m saying if I make fun of my weight or say negative things like “I’m fat!” If she grows up in a household hearing things like that or watching me obsess over food, you can bet she will be doing the same thing when she’s old enough to understand what “fat” means. I don’t say these words around her and get really annoyed when people poke her belly and call her ‘chubby.’ Not a good thing to be saying to a child.

Here’s a scary statistic I pulled off the internet:

"Nine - age at which at least half of all girls report having been on a diet.
Eighty percent of eighth grade girls say they are on diets."

You can bet when I was in Grade 8, I was worried about my weight. And at 9, I was leaving notes for myself in candy dishes saying “Chantelle, don’t eat this!” In fact, I can remember back to one of the first times I was really concerned about my weight. It was Grade 3 and during an indoor recess someone called me a “cow.” I still haven’t forgotten that. I remember obsessively weighing myself throughout elementary school and even kindergarten. I was 55 lbs in Kindergarten (if I’m remembering correctly) and 88 lbs in Grade 4 or 5. Funny how these sorta things stick with someone.

I don’t want Melina to grow up with the terrible self-esteem I have. I am doing everything in my power to instil healthy habits in my daughter. She watches me eat and exercise and she already is emulating my healthy (and sometimes unhealthy) habits. They’re like sponges.

You can bet when I was in Grade 8, I was worried about my weight. In fact, I can remember back to one of the first times I was really concerned about my weight. It was Grade 3 and during an indoor recess someone called me a “cow.” I still haven’t forgotten that. I remember obsessively weighing myself throughout elementary school and even kindergarten. I was 55 lbs in Kindergarten (if I’m remembering correctly) and 88 lbs in Grade 4 or 5. Funny how these sorta things stick with someone.

I don’t want Melina to grow up with the terrible self-esteem I have. I am doing everything in my power to instill healthy habits in my daughter. She watches me exercise and eats healthy because I cook healthy. How can you expect your children to have a healthy lifestyle if all you cook them is chicken fingers and French fries? Melina’s favourite food is chicken breast (cooked any and all ways) because we cook chicken so often. I read a fact in a magazine today that by age 3 children have started to make up their minds about what foods they like and dislike! Scary, hey? I remember being a kid and eating tons of macaroni and cheese and hot dogs (foods I hate now, by the way). But we are trying to incorporate healthy, balanced meals in Melina’s life so that is how she will be accustomed to eating by the time she’s old enough to start remembering her childhood. We aren’t perfect. There are days we go out for ice cream and hit up a drive-thru, but like I said in a previous entry, we eat healthy 80% of the time and ‘naughty’ 20% of the time.

What’s something you feel strongly about?

We do not remember days; we remember moments.

Side note: This entry is ALL over the place. But I feel in the spirit of reminiscing, I am going to leave it unedited.

It is weird for me to go to the town I was born in. I only lived there for the first four years of my life but most of my favourite childhood memories are from time spent visiting in that little town of 2,100 people.

My grandparents, many of my aunts and uncles on my mom’s side of the family and most of my cousins lived in ‘Hazy’ (as I’ll call it) and, as I child, we went to visit there quite often. The cousins always had so much fun raising hell in our grandparent’s basement, where our parents often dropped us off to do what we wished while the adults socialized upstairs.

It’s hard for me to believe that the days of hanging out with my cousins in that basement are long gone even though it’s been years since I have been in the basement with my cousins. Whenever I go to my Grandma’s now, I am reminded of all of the amazing times I had in Hazy during every summer of my childhood, every family get together, every Christmas.

Things are different at my Grandma’s now and it makes me sad to be there. Don’t get me wrong, I love visiting my Grandma and other relatives in Hazy but it breaks my heart being at her house. The obvious reason is that my Grandpa is no longer there anymore. It’s interesting though, because even though he’s not there I can still feel him in the house. I can still picture his spot at the kitchen table and his spot on the couch that’s no longer there.

While he was in the hospital last summer, there were little things lying around the house that showed Grandpa had been there recently – namely, his harmonica and his Toronto Maple Leaf slippers. I remember when we were visiting him while he was in the hospital, Melina was walking around the house with his slippers on and I had to make her take them off. Just out of respect, I guess.

I always enter my Grandma’s house with a heavy heart now, knowing Grandpa isn’t there to make silly jokes and whistle all day. I remember once when I was much younger, Grandpa made a joke about “hor'deurves”, calling them “horse overs.” Haha. I miss his stories at the supper table and his yummy garden veggies.

I know he’s still around and can feel his presence at the house sometimes. It’s hard to accept, though, that things will never be the same again. Hazy is a different little town now without my Grandpa as a physical part of it. Every time I have visited my Grandma in this past year, more and more changes are being made to her house. They’re good changes, like making small updates to the house. But it feels weird seeing things change in a house that went without change for so many years. I still miss the dark brown carpet in their upstairs living room that they had for so many years. It was thick carpet and attracted cat hair like crazy so it was a pain in the butt to keep clean but, dammit, that rug was a huge help in making epic, huge card castles!

I really don’t know where I was heading with this blog entry. I wanted to make note of the things that I miss about my hometown but it just goes hand-in-hand with my Grandpa’s passing.

I want Melina to be able to make memories at my Grandma’s house, the way that I made memories there growing up. Every time we go to visit, we pass a building or a landmark in the town that reminds me of something I experienced as a child – my first time tasting wine at a cousins wedding in the hall by my Grandma’s house (which led to my first alcohol-induced headache), hanging out at the local bank because it was the ‘cool’ place to be (or so I thought at the time), going to classes at the library during the summer, taking library books home without signing them out because my sister told me that there was a specific rack of books you could just take for free ( I still don’t know if there’s any truth to this), hanging out at the vintage-feeling ice cream shop my relatives owned, going into the bar underage to do a shot at the town’s centennial celebration (you’re not reading this, are you, Mom?) and the list goes on.

But the memories made around the city are nothing compared to the memories made with my family at my grandparents house – hanging out in the basement with Candace and having a ‘who can hold their arm up in the air the longest’ contest because we saw it on an episode of Survivor (I think we held it up for over an hour), looking through the scary storage area under the basement stairs and scaring each other down there because it was legit scary sometimes, traumatizing my slightly younger cousins with stories of Michael Smith (sorry Delaney) and other scary stories (sorry Brandi), throwing rocks at cars that pass by (okay, that was once and I was really young and a man got out of his car and yelled at us and that never happened again), being summer friends with the kids who lived next door, playing in the ball diamonds behind Grandma’s house, watching ball at the ball diamonds, having the whole family manage a huge sleepover in my grandparents house during every family get together (especially Christmas! That house is packed!), going to the outdoor swimming pool by the house, cabbage rolls and cucumber salad and other yummies that only Grandma’s can make, getting ran over by a boy on a bicycle in the driveway of my grandparents house (I swear this happened but no one has confirmed or denied it for me. It may have been a dream. But I distinctly remember my white blouse having tire marks across it haha), visiting with the family on the patio, listening to Grandpa fill the house with his harmonica playing, watching The Price is Right with Grandpa and the hockey games with Grandma (who cheers louder than anyone I’ve ever heard), Grandpa always saying “yeah, whatever”, going out to the farm with Grandpa to see what life was like there and learn a little bit about farming (none of which, I retained) and the list goes on and on and on...

I think a part of me doesn’t want to believe that I’m an ‘adult’ now with a husband and a family because I don’t want to let go of that part of my life. I know it’s part of my past now but I am going to do everything in my power to make sure I don’t forget how many great times I had in Hazy even though things have changed forever now.

Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose.

In order to succeed, you must first be willing to fail

The human memory is a pretty amazing thing. The other evening TJ & I were cleaning our bedroom and had music from ITunes playing as background noise. It blew my mind how many old songs we still had on our ITunes, songs I’ve completely forgotten about over the years. But what amazes me even more is the memories that these songs bring back. Memories, I’d also completely forgotten about.

It’s funny how any of these particular songs shoot me back to a moment in my life and it’s like I am there again, living life as I did back when I loved these songs and feeling all of the feelings (the good, the bad, the ugly) that accompanied listening to them at that time.

I googled this phenomenon and found a website that referred to it as “involuntary auditory memories” which I think is an accurate description. They defined it as “the act of deliberately forming strong associations between certain pieces of music and a particular place,” also, very accurate. There’s also involuntary olfactory memories, which deal with certain scents bringing back memories but that’s a whole different blog entry for another time.

Some of the memories that these songs trigger are great ones. For example, “The Adventure” by Angels & Airwaves reminds me of when TJ & I first started dating. One of the first nights we slept together (as in, slept in the same bed together, you perverts) I had the Angels & Airwaves CD playing on repeat all night. I woke up first that morning and just listened to the music as TJ lay next to me. I remember being blown away that this guy I’ve spent so many years knowing as only a username on a computer was lying in bed next to me. It was surreal. It was perfection. That whole CD still makes me smile and think of our love blossoming. Corny, but true.

“Love Story” by Taylor Swift is another song that stirs up a happy memory for me. I used to sing the song to Melina right after she was born. I’d search it on Youtube and sing it to her over and over while I rocked her to sleep. It was my favourite song at the time and I can’t listen to it anymore without being reminded of holding a newborn Melina in my arms.

I’ve come to realize that I know literally every country song that comes on the Sirius country station TJ listens to all of the time. And I’m not even a country fan. The only reason I know these songs is because they’re all old ones, from my childhood, and I am reminded of going for drives with my Mom, going to garage sales and singing these songs at the top of my lungs. I think it’s weird that I still remember every word to these songs, fifteen years later.

Of course, there are some songs that bring back negative emotions. “Broken Wings” by Bleed The Dream reminds me of my angsty, emotional time in high school, feelings of guilt, self-loathing, etc. I try not to listen to this song anymore because it reminds me of times that I’d rather not relive.

What songs take you back to a happy point in your life?

Success doesn't come to you, you go to it.

I recently found a blog post of questions titled “50 Questions That Will Free Your Mind". The questions are extremely thought provoking and I am going to dedicate today’s blog to answering one of the questions.

17. What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? What’s holding you back?

The one thing that I’ve done that I really would like to do is get a degree or a certificate of some sort. I did attend university briefly after high school so I do have a few credit hours under my belt and I did get to experience a bit of the “university life.” The reason I have not returned to school is simple – I have changed my mind 1000 times on what I want to do with my life.

When I first attended university, my major was Justice Studies because I was completely enthralled with the criminal mind. Not just any criminal’s mind, however. Mostly just psychopaths and murderers. Morbid, yes? But then I started thinking that maybe psychology was more what I was into so then I started thinking I’d like to have a minor in psychology. I actually think that I have more psychology classes under my belt than I do classes that are really relevant to justice studies haha. I was just really interested in what makes the criminal mind tick. I still am interested in that but I don’t think I could work in that field.

Last fall I got a job at the local newspaper. Writing has always been a passion of mine so I thought this job would open all sorts of doors for me. While it did fuel my writing passion momentarily, I grew tired of that job in rather quickly. It was exciting to have a job writing but the type of writing I was required to do was not something that could hold my interest for very long. While working at the paper, however, I decided I wanted to try university again. So I got re-admitted to the University of Regina in pre-journalism. But, after realizing how hard it would be to juggle working full time, all day, some evenings and taking care of a toddler at the same time, I quickly backed out.

Now, I have a new venture in mind that I am hesitant to even share on here. It’s something that I am recently very passionate about but I am worried about my quiet personality being a hindrance. I know it’s stupid but I am scared of telling everyone that I am going to further my education and then back out, again. I am afraid of failing but, more than that, I’m afraid of looking like a failure. I almost feel like if I do decide to go down this road, I won’t be telling very many people about it. That way, if I fail, I won’t feel embarrassed as well as feeling like a failure. I know that I need to get over this fear because it’s going to rub off on Melina and I definitely don’t want my shortcomings to become hers by my hand. But we’ll see what doors open, if any, in the near future and I’ll be keeping you all updated of course. ;)

What’s holding YOU back from doing something you really want?

It is never too late to be what you might have been.

Clean eating is a new concept for me. For the past three years, I have known ABOUT clean eating but never attempted to eat clean because (a) it isn’t always the most convenient option when you’re a rather new mother (AKA it’s so much easier to make some instant mashed potatoes and pop some chicken fingers in the oven than it is to make a meal from scratch) and (b) it seemed hard/impossible!

What is eating clean, exactly? According to the Eat Clean Diet website:

“It is eating the way nature intended. You eat the foods our bodies evolved to function best on, and that makes you feel – and look – fantastic. When you Eat Clean you eat more often. You will eat lean protein, complex carbs, and healthy fats. These practices keep your blood-sugar levels stable and keep you satisfied. The best part is that if you need to lose weight it will happen almost without you having to try. And yes, you can have a treat now and again.

Best of all, Eating Clean keeps you feeling great and full of energy. In fact, you can forget all about the days when “dieting” meant feelings of hunger, lethargy or deprivation.
Eating Clean is not a fad; it’s a way of life.”

TJ and I have been eating clean for two weeks now and I have come to a few conclusions.

1. It is FUN to find new and healthy recipes to try out! I have a whole binder full of “Chantelle’s Clean Recipes” now and I look forward to adding more recipes to it as time goes by! I do have one of the Eat Clean Diet cookbooks but I’ve found that a lot of the recipes in there are kind of intimidating due to amount of ingredients needed for the recipes and the types of ingredients. I will say this though, Old Fashion Foods is an amazing place to start looking for those obscure ingredients you’ve never heard of!

2. In these two weeks, I have not felt guilty after a meal. This is a huge accomplishment for me. There used to never be a day that went by where I didn’t feel some degree of guilt after a meal. But since we started eating clean, I have felt nothing but happy after meal time. I no longer feel bad about feeding my body crappy foods.

3. Before we started eating clean, we ate healthy most of the time. But there were some days where I’d use a box of stuffing or Uncle Ben’s 90 second microwave rice to round out supper which isn’t obviously the best choice but it was convenient. Now, I don’t even have the urge to use these convenience foods because natural food is just that much better!
I will admit though that there are times it is hard to feed TJ and myself as well as Melina while eating clean. She’s 2.5 years old – she doesn’t eat salad. But we make do. I have to make a little extra food sometimes but it’s worked for us.

I will be honest here though. We have had a ‘free day’ since the beginning of our eating clean adventure. Instead of derailing our progress like free days usually do, it’s kept us on track. We went to Regina over the weekend and treated ourselves to a supper out and a movie (which, of course, we *needed* to buy popcorn to feed TJs popcorn demons ;) ). And, again, instead of feeling guilty about treating ourselves, we didn’t because every other meal of the week we ate clean! I read in another blog somewhere the other day where the author admitted to eating “80% clean, 20% dirty” and I think that’s something completely doable within our family for the time being.

Im not trying to come off as an eating clean expert because I’m really not. At all. But it’s just so much fun to be doing a good thing for my body that I am excited to hopefully become better at this eating clean business one day! I have had a few friends inquire about clean eating since I started posting about it on Facebook and I love knowing that the healthy choices my family makes may make a difference in the way another family chooses to fuel themselves.

Today, I made chocolate chunk almond butter cookies. They. Are. Amazing. I may never go back to regular cookies, ever again. The best part? They’re made of clean ingredients! It’s definitely a treat though. There’s no way I can keep a constant stash of these bad boys in my house because, let’s be honest, I’ve had more than my fair share today. But it’s great to know I can satisfy my chocolate craving with something that is concerned clean, even if the cookies should be viewed as a treat!



Want the recipe? Check out this website. http://www.cleaneatingmag.com/Recipes/Recipe/Almond-Butter-Chocolate-Chip-Cookies.aspx This website/magazine is an excellent source for people wanting to check out some amazing clean eating recipes.

The future depends on what we do in the present

I have always had a bit of a temper, which surprises a lot of people I think. I come off as shy and quiet around people I don’t really know or am uncomfortable around but the truth is, when I am with my friends or family, I am a completely different person. I’m silly, dorky and I’ve come to realize, lately especially, that I sing a LOT (this is why Melina sing songs her way through half of the day most days). I am not a good singer but I constantly have a song stuck in my head, whether it’s the theme song to Caillou or Blue’s Clues or the Oompa Loompa song, which randomly came to me last week and has been rearing its ugly head daily, much to TJ’s dismay. Although I am happy-go-lucky most of the time, I do have a temperamental side that shows up once in a while, not often, but enough to make it a suitable blog topic, apparently.

A super quick synopsis for those of you who don’t know, TJ was in a car accident in Oct. 2009 that left him paralyzed from the chest down. A lot of my anger stems from my husband’s car accident. But first of all, let me make this clear, I don’t want to make this a therapy blog and I really do NOT want people feeling sorry for us. The reason I started this blog (“Me, Inspired”) was to get in touch with the inner Chantelle and blog about things that have happened or are happening to me as a way of keeping me inspired to live my life the way I want to live it. I am so iffy about blogging about TJ’s car accident not because it’s a sore subject, because it’s really not, but because I don’t want the accident to defy who we are as a couple, or, even as individuals. I have found that when I think about our relationship, I think about it in two ways – “before the accident” and “after the accident” and I hate that I do that. Yes, things are different because of the accident but we are still the same people on the inside. He still acts like an overexcited eight-year-old on Christmas and I’m right there beside him acting the same way. We are still the same people.

The anger I feel is not directed at TJ in any way, shape or form. I am angry at the situation. I am angry that we had to go through this. Yes, the accident made us stronger people and proved to me that our bond is like no other, but dammit, it makes me angry. And I’m allowed to be angry. It has taken me almost two years to realize it but I am allowed to feel this anger. Life shit on us, to put it eloquently. It did. But it could have been so much worse. TJ could’ve lost his life. It came so close to that.

When I get angry I ask myself, “why him?” Why did it have to be TJ to get into the accident? I can’t even count how many times I wish it had been me. I would’ve, no doubt, taken the paralysis news much differently than TJ did but I still wish it had been me in the truck instead of him.

Other times I am angry because I’m holding onto the memory of him leaving for work the night of his accident. I can remember it so well and I’m afraid it’ll be etched into my memory forever. TJ & I were hugging as he was about to leave for work and Melina, who had just turned one a week earlier, toddled up to us and wanted us to pick her up. So we had a three-way family hug and then Melina and I walked TJ to the door and watched him run to his truck, start it up and drive out of the driveway. When I think back to that night, I feel like a part of me knew something was going to happen. We never watched him drive away like that before. But I am always going to remember that moment. And other little moments from earlier that day as well, we had grilled cheese sandwiches and sweet potato fries for lunch. It really is like October 24, 2009 was the end of one part of my life. I remember every little detail and it still haunts me. I had a bath and had just hopped into bed to go to sleep when I got the phone call from “TJ” (the RCMP using TJ’s phone). I know it’s no fault of my own but I still get a little mad at myself when I think that I was lounging in the bath tub with a book as TJ was fighting for his life.

TJ and I have learned to make light of the situation. Hours after his diagnosis, TJ was making jokes about not being able to swing dance with me at our wedding. We had planned to surprise our guests with an awesome choreographed swing dance and had just begun practicing swing dancing when TJ had his accident. So that idea went out the window after the accident. But, you know what? Half way through our wedding reception, we stepped out onto the dance floor and did a little swing dance which we had practiced at home, with TJ in his chair, the week leading up to the wedding. It was perfect.

Melina has learned it’s pretty cool to have a dad in a wheelchair as she’s always hopping on his lap and driving around (or, at times, hijacking his car and taking it for a spin). In fact, when TJ was still in rehabilitation, Melina used to push him around in his chair all of the time, making her a very popular little girl in the ward TJ was staying in.
I guess, in a way, October 24, 2009 was the end of one chapter in my life. The 25th of October began a new, very different chapter but a new chapter, nonetheless. The 24th wasn’t the end of mine and TJ’s lives, and we don’t ever look at it that way. Yes, the way we live our day-to-day lives are very different now than ‘before’ the accident. But at least I am still able to look him in the eye and kiss him and know that with him everything will be okay.